Oct 12 2017 1:30pm

Is Fred OK? Riverdale 2x01 Heart-to-Heart

Riverdale, Season 2, Episode 1, "A Kiss Before Dying"

Show/Episode: Riverdale, Season 2, Episode 1, “A Kiss Before Dying”
Couple(s): Archie/Veronica (Varchie), Betty/Jughead (Bughead)

Riverdale, Season 2, Episode 1 Captain's Log

We begin our story the same way we ended season one: with plenty of d-r-a-m-a.

Fred Andrews (aka Hot Dad) is bleeding out, Archie Andrews is frantically driving his father to the hospital (without a valid driver's license), and there's blood like pretty much everywhere. On Archie's letterman jacket, all over Hot Dad, in the car, on the snow, covering the floor at Pop's. In other words, welcome back to Riverdale, the sweetest little murder town on TV.

The big questions of the episode: who shot our beloved Fred and will he survive?

Dun dun dun.

Once Fred is dramatically taken off to some old-fashioned looking ER by hospital staff, we cut to the rest of our cast of meddling kids. Betty is at home drinking OJ with her mom who has some very strong words to say about her daughter's deepening relationship with Jughead (“...if that beanie wearing cad defiled you...”), while Veronica is drinking a mimosa with her mom who also has some parental disapproval to dish out, while Jughead is back at his dad's trailer all alone without any form of orange juice. Then they all get the call to assemble and sit vigil over Fred's bedside (hotness alert: Jughead takes his father's motorcycle and it's attractive). Because this is a TV show, they all arrive at the same time for an epic group hug.

Or as my cousin said, “that's like the hug you dream about.”

Then it's time to pace and brood. Archie gives his statement to the (Kinda Hot) sheriff about the masked gunman with green eyes, but he's holding something back, while the sheriff thinks it's a simple robbery gone wrong. Veronica worries about being a good girlfriend in times of crisis. After all, Veronica knows how to do many things, but handling grief and sadness and blood? Not something in the Old Veronica Lodge handbook. Betty is just there being Betty. Jughead is still really attractive. Oh and he's also going to ask his Serpent connections if they know who shot his BFF's dad.

As for Hot Dad, well, he's having the customary “I've Been Shot and Am Unconscious” dream sequences where he's thrown into important scenes of Archie's life...only he's dead in them. They're threaded throughout the whole episode in order to show Fred is fighting for his life. In summary, he dreams about:

  1. Archie's graduation!
  2. Handing over the family business to Archie!
  3. Archie at Pop's wanting to propose to Veronica!
  4. Veronica walking down the aisle to the tune of bagpipes in a white dress!

Back in real Riverdale, the crew finally manages to convince Archie that he needs to clean his father's blood off of himself, and they send him home with Veronica, who argues that he looks like he's about to star in “the TV reboot of The Shining.” Great reference, Veronica. Also, kinda true. More brooding. Some emotional conversations, which I'll skip because that's not why I like this show. Back to brooding.

You know what helps brooding? Veronica does! Shower sex. Specifically shower sex with her pearls on. It's super steamy—in more way than one. But shower sex doesn't solve everything, and Archie's guilt and fear just come back causing him to lash out at Veronica in an attempt to push her away. But V isn't some wilting flower, so when Archie tells her to go, girl hits back, saying “I'm sorry, but I'm not going...try to push me away but I'm not going anywhere.” See, you are a great girlfriend Veronica!


Now, while Veronica and Archie are dealing with their emotions, Betty and Jughead get back into doing what they do best: police work. The couple that sleuths together stays together. Archie realizes that his dad's wallet is missing so Bughead heads off (on Jughead's motorcycle!) to Pop's to search the crime scene. As Jughead points out, this is Riverdale where no one just casually gets shot in a diner without it being a bigger conspiracy.

Unfortunately, they don't really find anything—besides a creepy monologue from Pop about how the shooter was pure evil and another classic horror movie references. They do get the chance to talk about their feelings over food and Betty's fear that Jughead is going somewhere she can't follow—a.k.a the Serpents. It's a tender moment that foreshadows some tough times to come with my favorite pair. Jughead sees wearing his father's jacket, living in his house, and driving his father's bike as keeping his father with him. Betty sees it as the first steps in her BF becoming a biker dude. To be honest, they are both probably right.

Being a teen is hard.

So while Betty and Jughead are off meddling/laying the groundwork for their eventual break-up, Veronica decides to confront her dear mother at the hospital chapel. After all, Hermoine Lodge is into some shady shit and has reason to hurt Fred. In a very sinister scene backlit by a million votive candles, Hermoine reminds her daughter that she's a Lodge, first and foremost and warns that her daughter needs to remember that for when daddy comes home. Creepy.

Just when the episode is getting good MY TV LOOSES SIGNAL and when it comes back Josie and her Pussycats are talking to Archie. Oh, well, I assume nothing important happened while my life was a black screen. Right? RIGHT?!


Eventually, Archie tells his friends the truth—the truth about the shooting he's been hiding from the sheriff and that truth reminds me why I sometimes hate teenagers. See, the masked gunman didn't just shoot his dad and run. No, he shot Fred and put his gun to Archie's head....while Archie did nothing. Because apparently Archie is bulletproof and thinks he could have tackled the guy. That's what's been eating him up. That's the guilt. Poor, dumb Archie. Again, being a teen is really hard.

With that off his chest, he goes to see his hospitalized dad - who is unconscious on a spiritual journey of his own—only to find Cheryl Blossom already there kissing Fred's head. In a very weird exchange, Cheryl explains that Archie gave her “the kiss of life” so she's not giving it to his father. Like CPR and a forehead kiss are the same things in Riverdale. She assures Archie that Fred will be alright and she leaves (super weird) and then it's time for a heart-to-heart that wakes Fred up from the almost dead.

Thank goodness. Hot Dad survives. What would this show be without his calm, wise hotness?

With Fred back with the living, the show starts to wrap up... in some pretty nefarious ways. After a lovely Bughead kiss—the first of the new season!—Jughead returns home to find the Serpents have brought him a gift... in the form of a beaten man. They wanted to show that they're taking his request for answers seriously because Jughead is now like the Serpent King? Poor Betty. Veronica also comes home to a surprise: daddy's home. It's very Godfather. Her dad backlit in shadows sitting at the head of the table, her mom on his left side standing, a lot of talk about family. Hiram Lodge demands a kiss from his daughter, and when she gets close we see that we have another Hot Dad alert! Hiram Lodge is also pretty dang attractive. Thank you, show for casting Mark Consuelos, thank you.

But none of this compares to the big, sinister ending over at Archie's. Having trouble dealing with the reality of grief, our hero has decided to protect his father—no matter what. So while his mom is helping with the healing, Archie has settled down for guard duty at the base of the stairs with a bat. Little does he know that Fred is not the one in danger right now. Cut to Miss Grundy's VW Beetle a few towns over where she's giving inappropriate piano lessons to another teen boy. After seeing her lover/student to the door, she returns...and is MURDERED by the man in the mask!

Dun dun dun again.

Someone seems to have it out for Archie. Who could it be?

(P.S. Cheryl also has this whole big subplot with her mom and blackmail and third-degree burns but I wanted to focus on the main craziness, hit me up in the comments if you want to talk about the Blossom family bombshell: Clifford might not have hung himself in the barn that night...)

Memorable Lines:

Pop: “He wasn't a thief...this man was the angel of death had come to Riverdale.”
Jughead: “Jesus, Pop lighten up. You sound like the cranky old guy from Friday the 13th.

Charting the Course:

Bughead is in for some choppy water, but it's Veronica and Archie that look like they're in for the real rough ride. Two houses divided, a murderous masked man who is killing people connected to Archie, and double Hot Dads. What will these kids do?

Next Stop:

Season 2, Episode 2, “Chapter Fifteen: Nighthawks”


H&H Editor Picks:

Should We Ship Riverdale’s Jughead with Betty—or Anyone?

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October 2017 Romance Novels New Releases Shopping List






Lizzie Poteet is a hopeless romantic who appreciates a good kilt and a sexy Scottish burr. Even if she can hardly understand it. She studied abroad at the University of St. Andrews on the off chance she would fall back in time and meet her own warrior soul mate. Sadly, she didn’t and now lives in New York with her dog Mr. Darcy where she watches a lot of TV by night and working as a literary agent by day. You can follow her @lizziepoteet.

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EC Spurlock
1. EC Spurlock
Poor Archie, he sounds like my teenage son after we had a break-in at our house. Really, doing nothing was the smartest thing he could have done and is probably why he is still alive. Still, wondering how Ms Grundy is connected to all this - that epilogue came way out of left field.

And may I say, Mark Consuelos is giving me serious Louis Jourdan vibes.
Heather Waters
2. HeatherWaters
I'm getting "the sweetest little murder town on TV" stitched on a pillow. LOLOLOL

Adored the big group hug. I do really, truly like all these kids.

I dreaded the return of Ms. Grundy the Predator, so I suppose that takes care of that!
EC Spurlock
3. EC Spurlock
Waitwaitwait -- What happened to Cheryl's WHEELCHAIR-BOUND GRANDMA when she burned down the house???
Heather Waters
4. HeatherWaters
@EC Spurlock -- Wasn't Grandma just visiting last season? I don't know that she lives there full-time. At least, I REALLY hope not...
EC Spurlock
5. EC Spurlock
And BETTY'S PREGNANT SISTER!! Was she still living with the Blossoms??

Heather Waters
6. HeatherWaters
@EC Spurlock -- Pretty sure she's back with the Coopers. But I'm with you, we need more on what's up with Cheryl this week!
Elizabeth Poteet
7. ElizabethPoteet
@EC Spurlock - technically she moved back home after the baby shower, but WHERE WAS SHE this episode? Like you'd think we'd see the pregnant sister around, right?

And Cheryl was mad scary this episode, blackmailing her mother, cutting of her oxygen supply, kissing people's dads. I'ver never really had a firm grasp on her character. One minute she's a stereotypical bitch, the next I'm rooting for her and Archie as a ginger power couple. Burning the house down with her mother still in it - while SHE'S still in it? Psycho move, Cheryl, super crazy.
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