Dec 16 2013 8:03am

No Shirts, Please: Hercules Trailer

Do you think there was a memo circulating around Hollywood?

Early 2014's films should:

  • Be set in ancient times
  • Have muscular men whose characters have a moral mission (and no shirts)
  • Have action in slow-motion, the better to highlight the muscles (because, again, no shirts allowed!)
  • Have at least one catchphrase that is both motivating and over-the-top
  • Remember, NO SHIRTS.

Hercules will be in theaters in January 2014.

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Rae Alley
1. rszalley
The next trick question is where does this match up to the mythology of Hercules? Or did they go to the Disney school.of rewriting stories? Don't get me wrong, I'll probably still go see it (shirtless men fighting!) But I worry about folks using this to cram before a test in the future. :)
Lynne Connolly
2. Lynne Connolly
as a big fan of shirtless men, I can honestly say - that looks awful. I like a bit of acting in my movies. Not on my list.
K.M. Jackson
3. kwanawrites
No shirts... but bronzer and hilights are a must. This one looks funny. I see another John Carter here.
Megan Frampton
4. MFrampton
I think this is a prime candidate for a hate-watch, preferably with a group of girlfriends and a bottle of wine.
Darlene Marshall
5. DarleneMarshall
Is it too much to ask that we get dialogue, plot,and acting along with bare chests? Is it?

Sadly, I'm finding the same problem with these movies that I have with bad porn (written or filmed)--my attention wanders and I find myself wishing I was reading a good book instead.
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