Jun 27 2011 10:49am

True Blood Season 4 Episode 1: Fairy Godmothers Suck

True Blood Season 4The True Blood finale from last season left a LOT of the characters’ fates up in the air, and while we did get some answers in the season premiere that showed last night, in grand True Blood tradition, I’m pretty sure I ended up with a few more questions than answers.

*******SPOILERS BELOW*******

The episode begins with Sookie popping up in Faery with her godmother, the woman we’ve been introduced to as “Claudine” throughout season 3. There are other faeries as well as other humans all around. Everything is twinkle-y, and pretty.

Sookie even runs into Barry the bellboy from season 2—they’re both offered these ridiculous glowing pears, but she uses some part of her brain and is hesitant to eat them. Then a person in the crowd catches her eye, and it turns out to be her grandfather. Funny thing, though, Granddaddy is the same age she remembers from 20 years previous.

And if it’s not weird enough running into a grandfather who hasn’t aged in twenty years you’re in luck, ’cause it just gets weirder from there. The beautiful faeries turn into hideous troll goblins when Sookie won’t eat a piece of that glowing fruit, and the shit really hits the fan. Sookie does that thing she does with her hands where she explodes light and it destroys the glamour all around them and their world.

Grandaddy Earl in True BloodAll of a sudden they’re in a desolate wasteland, and the troll/goblin things, led by Queen Mab, start lobbing these weird fireballs at Sookie and Granddaddy as they try to run away, but of course someone takes pity on Sookie and tells her if she jumps in this extremely large black pit she can go back home. So she and Granddaddy jump into the big hole in the earth and they land back into the cemetery in Bon Temps. But since Earl ate the light fruit, he starts deteriorating right away, but not before he gives her his pocket watch to give to Jason.

Maybe I’m cold-hearted, but when Sookie breaks down crying over someone who I assume she mourned when she was, what, 7 or 8 years old?, I had to roll my eyes. I would’ve been crying over the fact that he didn’t have a gift for me too. What makes Jason so special?

So Sookie rolls up to her house and she quickly realizes that time has passed quicker on earth while she was away—in fact, it’s been just a bit over a year, not the 15 minutes Sookie thought she was away. The rest of the episode we’re teased with where all the characters ended up after Sookie flashed into Faeryland.

Sookie and Lafayette in True Blood Season 4Andy Bellefluer has turned into a full-on V addict, and Jason has to be the one to settle him when Andy shows up to Sookie’s house and starts raging at her about being missing for the past year and all the energy he put into trying to find her. And also later when Jason has to be the voice of reason after Andy shows up to Merlotte’s demanding some V from Lafayette. Let me just say, it’s a f’d up world when Jason is the voice of reason to the Sheriff of the town.

Lafayette and Jesus are still together (yay!). Last season hinted that Jesus was heavily into the occult, and sure enough, when we first see the pair, he’s dragging Lafayette to some Coven gathering. The waitress who helped Arlene last season is there, along with a few new characters, including their leader, Marnie, who is all together creepy, and of course singles  Lafayette out right away.

Marnie begins channeling Eddie (the vamp who got killed in season 1, thanks to Lafayette). Oh, and in case you’re wondering, Eddie forgives Lafayette. But yeah, L freaks the hell out and runs out of there. But Jesus, being the sexy influencer that he is, convinces L to give the Coven another try the next day.

So Lafayette braves the cult again while Marnie has the group gathered to help her parrot cross into death smoothly (yes, I said parrot). She ends up demanding that Lafayette join the circle even though he doesn’t want to, and as soon as he joins in, Marnie starts changing her chant and brings the freakin’ bird back to life! But as soon as Lafayette disconnects from the circle, the bird dies again. Hmmm, wonder if the crazy witch lady is going to use Lafayette for some sinister ass shit this season? My guess is “HELL YES!”

Jessica and Hoyt in True BloodJessica and Hoyt have moved in together, but they aren’t having the fairy-tale life they imagined—the first scene with them has them having this odd-ball fight about Jess not cooking food, then she cracks some eggs in a pan, shells and all, for about 3 seconds, and throws them on a plate runny/raw and he starts eating them (which totally made me dry heave). But then she starts laughing, and that was the end of the scene.

Later, they’re both at Fangtasia, where she’s finding it hard to keep away from a human—a fangbanger—who’s hitting on her. I was a little confused by the importance of the two of them, and their relationship, but I can only guess that they’re going to cause some drama this season. Especially if Jessica keeps dancing like she was at Fangtasia. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

We find out that Tommy isn’t dead from Sam’s gunshot. And hold on to your hats, people, he’s found a sugar momma. You’ll never guess who it is...Hoyt’s mom! Yes, Ms. Fortenberry and Tommy show up to Merlotte’s with Tommy in a leg brace, wearing a button-up and dockers. This was absolutely the first “WTF” moment of the episode. I’m not sure how this is all going to play out, but I’m glad that he’s not dead, and I hope to all things holy that I’m wrong about the sugar momma thing. :Shudders:

Eric Northman in True Blood Season 4Arlene’s baby has been born and the first and only scene we get of the demon child is that he’s ripped the heads off of six barbies while left alone for a few minutes. Every last one of them. The baby’s name is Mikey, and even though he’s meant to be Satan’s spawn, he’s pretty freakin’ adorable.

We learn that Tara’s turned into a cage fighter! Hell, yeah, that girl finally figured out what to do with all that aggression (and those ripped biceps). Oh, and another small detail, Tara’s also batting for the other team now. She’s in a full-on make out scene with her girlfriend when Lafayette texts her to let her know that Sookie is alive and back in Bon Temps. “Toni” (Tara’s new name) tells her girlfriend that the text was because her grandmother died back in Atlanta, letting the audience realize that Tara has completely run away from herself and her past... We’ll just see how long she can stay away from the madness that is Bon Temps.

Jason has ended up looking after the hillbillies for Krystal (panther girl) and thankfully he hasn’t completely smartened up. By the end of episode, the hillbillies have tricked him into an extra large icebox and locked him in. But don’t worry, he doesn’t sound really all that mad to be in there…I wonder if it’s not the first time this has happened to him.

At the end, Eric is in Sookie’s bedroom just as she’s about to change into her nightgown, (um yeah, of course she doesn’t get it on, though). So she’s standing there barely covered by her pink silk nightie and he informs her that he owns the house now and therefore she “IS HIS” And he whips out his fangs and goes for her.

Lafayette in True BloodEveryone has changed in the past 12 months; Lafayette has a faux hawk, Sookie found a colorist who dyed her hair a blonde shade that actually looks good with her skin tone, Tara’s previous short bob is now long and straight.

But the largest shocker happens when we’re following one of the coven members back to a heavily guarded house, and she walks in to a room and she says “Good evening, your majesty” and you assume it’s going to be Queen Sophie-Anne, but when the camera pans out, it’s Bill! WTF?

Bill Compton in True BloodIt was so WTF that I went to Twitter and asked my resident TB partner Nat, how the hell Bill is the King, and she said that “no, he’s the Magistrate” (remember Eric killed the old Magister last season).

So we wanna know what you think: Do you think Bill actually killed Sophie-Anne at the end of last season, and now he’s King, or do you agree with Nat, and you think that he’s the new Magister?


Jessica Turner reviews Urban Fantasy, Paranormal and Sc-Fi Romances on her site The Spinecracker and is a trained chef who lives in San Diego with her very Irish husband.

Subscribe to this conversation (must be logged in):
1. Sapphire
Go watch episode 2. It's on HBOgo and I heard it's on demand too, but a lot of questions from the first episode are answered :)
Jessica Turner
2. TheSpinecracker
Sapphire: I don't wanna, then I'll have to wait 2 weeks for a new episode! ;)
3. adelle
I was very confused by this entire episode. I liked it but WTF! Curious to see where this season is going.
Natasha Carty
4. WickedLilPixie
Perfect Jess and I am still all WTF was I tripping when I watched it? LOL
Jessica Turner
5. TheSpinecracker
Adelle: It did feel a little "all over the place" but im happy that I'm at least curious about what's been happening to all the characters the last year and how they all got fancy new hair stylists ;)

Nat: I KNOW! and I'm not gonna cheat and watch epi 2 either. So you and I can suck air together next week when we figure some shit out.... well hopefully figure some shit out
Megan Frampton
6. MFrampton
Okay, so I watched, and here's what I'm thinking:

Bill is definitely the King, because why else would Eric have obeyed him when he said to step off? There's no way Eric would do that unless there was some hierarchy in there.

No wonder Tara's playing for the other team, given her previous men experience. I wonder if Alan Ball heard husbands the country over (such as mine) commenting on the massive imbalance between the hawt maleness and the paltry female selection. And answered with some girl-on-girl action.

I totally agree with Jessica about Sookie--why is she mourning all over again when she already thought she'd lost her grandad? And how could she possibly think he was going to be able to be back in her world? Sookie is not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

I had to roll my eyes at Eric's saying 'you are mine' or whatever to Sookie. SUCH a PNR hero (is he changing his nhame to Ehric?). Gak. I hate that owning crap.

And how cool will it be if Pam becomes an unwilling mom to Jessica?

Thanks for the recap, Jessica!
Jessica Turner
7. TheSpinecracker
MF: *snort* the thought of Pam mentoring Jessica nearly made me choke on my diet coke. It's about damn time Pam had a minion though! I'm all for her evil ways. I also thinks its odd that Jess is all sex kitten now on the dance floor. Guess she's gotten over the fact that she becomes hyman-ly challenged each time after sex huh?

I agree that Bill has some power over Eric, but he would as Magistre too. So I'm still not sure on that one.

And Eric has always been "Ehric" to me. He's so damn cave man some times. But I lurve him, and I better get more than 2 and half minutes of him in the next episode~
Natasha Carty
8. WickedLilPixie
Please note Megan said I WAS RIGHT. This may never happen again people.
romance reader
9. bookstorecat
I assumed Bill got to be King by killing Queen Sophie. I think he said he was "challenging" her in the season finale last year, then they did that whole lame Matrix-y levitating throwdown thing. The point of killing the Queen was to keep Sookie safe...or did Bill have ambitious ulterior motives??
10. Slyn
I want Tara and Tara getting into women is so not cool for me.
Jacqueline Banks
11. dogonhunter
Okay, I was trying to avoid going to On Demand, but after reading this I need a TrueBlood fix.

I can't wait to see what HBO does with Scented Lust and Scented Dreams.
Jessica Turner
12. TheSpinecracker
Bookstorecat: That's what I think too. And yeah the Matrix style "non-battle" really cheezed me.

Slyn: You're still holding out hope for that? Hmmmm

Dogonhunter: What's Scented Lust and Scented Dreams? *perks up*
Zuradia Worrell
13. zuradia
@Slyn- I really don't think anything between Jason and Tara is going to happen. With Tara running from all things supernatural, and Jason eventually being beitten and turned into a were-panther, can you see that happening?

I think I dig Bill being King. But is he King of Louisianna or Missippi? Anything is better than him being the whiney, mooning bitch he's been for the past three seasons.

Now the action between Eric and Sookie is what I wanna see. Or between Sookie and Alcide. Alcide is a nice guy.

I am not feeling Jose right now. He is dragging Lafayete into some seriously creepy shit. That Marnie lady needs to stay out of the black maic section of her spell books.

I think Andy is acting like a tool. Right along with his bitch of a sister Portia. You'd think she'd figure out that if Bill wanted to tap that ass, he would have done so by now. Any just isn't Andy . I don't like him hooked on V.

I like this serious side of Jason. He's still an idiot, but he's an honorable idiot. Where the heck is Crystal helping him take care of all them kids? For that matter, where did all the adults go in Hotshot? I guess I'll see on Sunday.
14. A.J. Wilson -
Honestly, I'm a HUGE True Blood fan, and was estactic when the new season finally began. That being said, the beginning reminded me of a really, really, cheesy 80's B movie and I couldn't help but wonder if this is something that is going to continue.

@Megan - Totally snorting right now. Until you mentioned it, I never even thought about Eric obeying Bill. It was odd to be sure, but it didn't click until you mentioned it. But Bill the king? I hope not, I'm not a big Bill fan.

I'm hoping the second episode is more Sookie and less all over the place. Book 4 was by far and away my favorite of the series and I hope that don't totally go off track here
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