Believe it or not, the wait is finally over: True Blood's seventh and final (!!!) season is now under way. Tune in each week as we recap and discuss the last chapter in the story of our favorite Bon Temps residents.
This post contains SPOILERS for all aired episodes of True Blood, including last night’s Season 7, Episode 7, “May Be the Last Time.” Enjoy!
When we last left Bon Temps, Sarah Newlin claimed she could heal her sister Amber of Hep-V, Lafayette (aka LaLa) actually agreed with Lettie Mae, and Bill was apparently dying superfast of Hep-V, probably thanks to Sookie’s fae blood. How are the good times rolling this episode?
Eric, Pam, and the Yakuza roll up to Amber’s house, Fast and the Furious style, where they encounter her newly healed when she opens the door. They interrogate her, but she refuses to divulge Sarah’s whereabouts. However, she does let it slip that Sarah herself is the cure to Hep-V. In a fit of rage and hallucination, Eric stakes her. Pam was shocked and the Yakuza were pissed, so this seems like a good place to roll opening credits.
Andy and Holly go looking for their kids and realize that at some point they left their cell phones at Fort Bellefleur, but they are currently nowhere to be found. Meanwhile, Sookie, Bill, and Jessica mourn Bill’s accelerated condition. Andy calls Bill looking for Jessica to make sure she hasn’t “felt” that Adilyn was in any danger. Of course, she isn’t yet, but the unstable Violet is up to something. She takes Adilyn and Wade to her mansion and ushers them into what can only be called a fully functional sex dungeon. Before she leaves the kids to it, she plants a long kiss on Adi, which wasn’t weird at all. Nope.
As Arlene is closing the bar, Keith the Vampire With the Mesmerizing Eyes (aka Keith) sneaks up on her and offers his assistance to escort her home safely. After properly assuring him that she was no fang banger, he gave her what looked to be multiple orgasms on the pool table. Then Arlene woke up because it was one of those pesky v-blood dreams, dammit!
Pam is really mad at Eric, and you can tell because she is throwing couture at him. She pleads with him to set his homicidal vengeance for Sarah Newlin aside, at least long enough to get healed. Right on cue, the bigger than life Mr. Gus offers Eric and Pam a deal. If they do the legwork to find Sarah with the power of the Yakuza behind them, they can have 49% of the profits of the “New Blood” franchise the corporation will start with her synthesized blood. At first Eric declines, especially when Mr. Gus reveals that he wants Eric to be the new spokesman, but eventually Eric agrees to the deal. We are all left wondering if he actually means to keep his end.
While Jessica and Sookie discuss believing in miracles, specifically as it relates to finding a cure for Bill, he is dreaming about the past again; this time, he dreams about his father arranging his marriage. Bill is reluctant to marry as he wants to travel, but when his father reveals he is dying, Bill immediately falls in line.
Hoyt shows up at Bellefleur's with a super hot blonde girlfriend in tow. It takes about two minutes for Arlene to figure out that Hoyt has no idea who Jason is. She calls Jason, who is cleaning up the remains of his relationship with Violet. He confirms that Hoyt doesn’t know him, and pleads with Arlene to not say anything to Hoyt. He gets to the restaurant in record time, and ends up invited for breakfast. Because it’s Jason, he is also sharing eye-banging looks with Hoyt’s true love. Jason takes Hoyt to view his mother’s body and lies to Hoyt about her involvement with the mob that took over the town. Hoyt’s gratitude for Jason’s kindness manifested in a threeway hug with Jason in the middle.
Sookie calls in the quirky, tiny, sassy, and David Lynch-esque Dr. Ludwig for a consultation with Bill. The good doc rejects the hypothesis that Sookie’s fae blood is responsible for the Hep-V’s accelerated progression, but asks after her lineage to be sure. When Sookie reveals she is related to Niles, the doc says, “I am so fucking out of here!” and leaves. Sookie tries to summon her grandfather Niles, but is unsuccessful...she thinks. Turns out he is at her house and wants spaghetti. It also turns out that Niles is always watching Sookie’s back, and knew she was infecting Bill, but he promised to try to help Bill for Sookie’s sake. After showing her a miracle in Bill’s past, Niles reveals that magic can’t help Bill.
Meanwhile, Andy and Holly still have no luck finding Wade and Adilyn (who have decided that they don’t need toys and lube to have a good time.) Sarah turns up at the old Fellowship of the Sun compound and has a conversation with a conjured Jason Stackhouse, who assures her that Eric is coming for her head. Speaking of heads, the Yakuza used global face recognition software to find Sarah while Eric and Pam were sleeping so that may be bad news for them. Vampire Keith (for real this time) comes to Arlene’s aid when her depression summons him. He invites her to dance, even after she reveals she is Hep-V positive. Swoon!
Sarah has officially cracked, as evidenced by her conversations with her dead ex-husband and dead ex-boyfriend. (Apparently True Blood is using flashbacks and hallucinations to trot out all of our faves for this last season.) But Sarah better wake up, as the Yakuza, along with Eric and Pam, have found her. Apparently, Mr. Gus decided to stick to his deal after all. Violet wakes up and checks in on the lovebirds who are happy as larks. She then knocks Wade out and handcuffs Adi to the bed. This is looking very bad for them; luckily Jessica got the distress call and is on the way.
Sookie flits out of her house in a white dress which usually means someone’s getting laid or something important is going to happen. Or both. The important happening here is that Sookie tells Bill she is going to stay with him until the end, and proves it by getting busy with him by the fire. Was that scene awkward for anyone else? Are Mr. Gus and Eric playing each other? And what in the world is Violet up to? Guess we will have to tune in next week.
Nicole Leapheart's alter ego is Miss Boxy Frown, and she posts book reviews and TV recaps at missboxyfrown.blogspot.com. She reads and watches everything from romance to sci-fi, but enjoys it even more if some smut is involved. And tattoos.