Wed
Jun 4 2014 10:00am

True Blood’s Most WTF Sex Moments

Jason and Amy in bed in True BloodThe team at Heroes & Heartbreakers fell for the supernatural southern charm of True Blood a long time ago. The final season is coming up, and as we look back on the series, there are a great number of elements—and actors—that make the show standout. However, there are two elements we’ve often tracked in our recaps of the show: nudity and WTFery. Today we look back at the pivotal scenes that incorporated both.

Join us as we remember the best WTF sex scenes from True Blood.

Jason and Amy in True BloodSeason 1: Sex as Hallucination

We’re introduced to sex with a vampire in the first season of True Blood. This isn’t really all that weird in the world of paranormal novels, but when was the last time you saw graphic, bite-y sex on TV?

Still, that doesn’t mean season one was all vanilla vampire coitus. Nope. Our special sex the first season came as a result of vampire blood ingested by humans. Namely: Jason and Amy. They didn’t even really have sex. The two take the blood—dubbed V—get silly high and have trippy hallucinations together in lieu of sex.

Maryann in True BloodSeason 2: Magic-induced orgies. Sometimes with a side of cannibalism.

The second season of True Blood was when we took a hard turn toward crazy town (and our first mega deviation from the literary counterpart). While the Maenad was a tiny portion in SECOND BOOK, Maryann was vital to True Blood Season 2. She was the source of copious nudity on the show, as she fed off the energy of violence and lust.

Her parties became orgies that no one remembered the next day, and in one particularly creeptastic scene she feeds Tara and Eggs a human heart inside a soufflé. After dining cannibal style, the two start hitting each other. Then there’s more sex later.

So much crazy people sex.

Season 3: Head-spinning sex. Literally

Hate sex. We’ve read it in many novels, but if you want to see the epitome, True Blood’s Season 3 brings it. Bill hates his maker Lorena. He hated her for years before she finally released him from his obligation to obey her. Then she gets in league with Russell Edgington and weasels her way back in. She doesn’t want him to have Sookie, but more than that, she plans to own his heart again.

He won’t give her his heart, but he is willing to give her another part of his anatomy. This isn’t your typically violent, thrusting angry sex. No, Bill snaps Lorena’s neck and spins her head 180 degrees. Blood spills from her lips as she smiles, because even with a broken neck she’s getting what she wants.

Lorena has issues.

Sookie and Eric in True BloodSeason 4: Snow Sex in Louisiana

We waited a very long time to see Eric and Sookie FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY hook up. It wasn’t what book readers expected (the show had already done a bloody shower sex scene, after all.

So, while Season 4 didn’t bring as much WTF in the nookie department, it did give us a very unexpected take on Eric and Sookie’s first time. Normally we don’t see V drug-like hallucinations during vampire-human sex, but these two were both high on blood and that mean sex in the snow.

(Watch the scene here.)

Eric and Nora in True BloodSeason 5: Incestuous Vampires

Eric Northman (Alexander Skarsgard) brings his A game to his every sex scene on True Blood. So when we see him shoving Nora up against the wall inside a freight car, it’s undeniably hot. Except for that whole “sibling” squick factor. They actually call one another brother and sister while having sex.

This isn’t Game of Thrones, though. They aren’t brother/sister in the traditional sense, which helps, but then Eric has to close out the scene with the line: “We fight like siblings, but we fuck like champions.”

(Watch the scene here.)

Alcide's threesome in True BloodSeason 6: The Packmaster Doubles Up

There were a lot of issues with Season 6 and its storyline for Alcide. Most of those complaints stemmed from him becoming a huge jerk following his “promotion” to Packmaster.

What helped solidify this change? Werewolf three-way in the woods. In fairness, he’s a really big guy, so there probably was enough to go around.

 


While Chelsea Mueller runs Vampire Book Club, she won’t turn down a sexy werewolf, demon or faerie. Her appreciation of Alexander Skarsgard is well documented. Bother her on Twitter — @ChelseaVBC — she likes it.

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3 comments
Jennifer Proffitt
2. JenniferProffitt
I LOVE this post and remember ALL of the scenes you talked about. The one that skeeved me out the most though was the head turning one. I do have another to nominate. My friend got turned off by the show--and refused to watch it--after the episode where I believe Bill comes out from being buried all day to protect himself from the sun. He's covered in dirt and goes and has sex with Sookie. It grossed my friend out to think all that dirt going from Tab A to Slot B. And this time when I say "friend" I really do mean friend!
Chelsea Mueller
3. ChelseaMueller
@JenniferProffitt -- Ha! I actually seriously love that scene and the desperate need they have to celebrate life, as it were.
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