Our Lost Girl obsession is still going strong! Be sure to check out all of our recaps, from Season 1 up to the most recent Season 2 episode aired on SyFy (episode 1, episode 2, episode 3, episode 4, episode 5, episode 6, episode 7, episode 8, episode 9, episode 10, episode 11, episode 12, episode 13, and episode 14, and episode 15). All caught up? Good. And now, on to the recap for last night’s episode, 2.16, “School’s Out.”
Spoiler Policy: Please remember that there is a strong NO SPOILERS policy for any and all comments. We are ONLY DISCUSSING episodes of Lost Girl that have ALREADY AIRED IN THE UNITED STATES. Be kind and respectful by not ruining it for those who have yet to watch all of Season 2. Thanks!
At Hilton Hovel (drink!), Bo stands next to a tub full of bubbles in front of the antique standing mirror and frantically ties her red kimono (mine!) as Kenzi’s voice calls into the room. “You slept in,” she observes upon arrival. “How me of you.” Bo tightly observes that Kenzi is there: “I thought you were sleeping over at Nate’s.” Kenzi explains that Nate dismissed her while he surprises her with breakfast. “But I peeked and it’s totally pancakes of the chocolate chip variety.”
“Oh,” Bo says through a fake smile, giving the tub behind her a quick check. “Yum!” Kenzi adds, “Plus a morning without my succubus would be like waking up to a virgin mimosa!” Bo agrees it’s the same for her, though perhaps this morning is wishing she’d dumped the booze down the drain for once. Wandering around the room, Kenzi observes that based on the rough and tumble condition of her bed, it looks like Bo was tossing and turning all night. Yeah she was. “I’ve just got a lot on my mind,” Bo understates. And elsewhere apparently as behind her, Ryan rises up from beneath the bubbles gasping for air. Hilariously and without hesitation, Bo shoves his head right back under.
Kenzi believes she knows what’s going on here, which makes Bo even more nervous. “You’re losing sleep over that dark fae-dar,” Kenzi says with sympathy. Well, yes she is, but not how you think, babe. Bo goes with it though. “You being you,” Kenzi says, “you have certain needs, and I don’t expect you to holster your honey pot.” Bo: “Oh, gee, thanks.” “But Ryan totally screwed with me,” Kenzi reminds Bo in all seriousness. BFF code demands you dump the dude who messes with the bestie. Bo knows this and shifts uncomfortably as she dissembles about how wrong Ryan was in that knowing all the while the dark fae of their discontent is snorkeling in the tub behind her.
Kenzi confirms Bo “eighty-sixed” Ryan, twisting the knife deeper, and Bo hugs her, spinning around so Kenzi no longer faces the tub and shoves her toward the door. “Why don’t you just go and enjoy your flap jacks, short stack,” Bo suggests…strongly. Kenzi asks if Bo wants to join t them. “And third wheel all over your sexy breakfast?” Bo asks. “No way.” Kenzi arches with satisfaction. “That is why I love you!” she exclaims with a boogie. And why we love you both. Bo calls back that she loves Kenzi too.
Ryan plunges out from under the bubbles, laughing uproariously. “This is crazy!” Bo tells him. “That was so close!” Ryan thinks it was hilarious. “She is my best friend! I can’t keep hiding you in the bathtub! What’s next, my teeny tiny closet?” Heh.
Ryan admits that’s a good point. “We haven’t done it in your closet yet.” Bo rolls her eyes. “This is all fun and games to you, isn’t it? I mean, I don’t think I can keep it up!” she worries. I think he has that covered, sweetie. “Don’t worry about it, that’s my job,” Ryan quips. I may just love him for that alone. Weary with his antics, Bo wonders if he has anything serious to contribute, seriously. Ryan says “yeah, one sec,” dives back down under the bubbles, and comes back up with two champagne flutes in hand filled to the brim with soapy water. “Bubbly?”
Cut to a high school class room. Ooohhhh. Massive flashback just gave me major brain freeze. The teacher announces that before they get to the day’s reading, she needs Beverly to come to the front of the class, a situation that rarely ends well. As the hot, totally not age appropriate Beverly struts to the front of the class, the teacher snarks that Beverly has risen from the ranks of her previously mediocre work to write a dissertation on Romeo and Juliet that Teacher hopes to see published in the most illustrious academic journals of the day. Confused, Beverly takes the paper from Teacher and prepares to read it aloud as instructed. Within seconds she’s spiraling through a treatise comparing the star-crossed lovers to Khrushchev and Kennedy’s conflicts during the Cold War. That is not a ‘ship you want to cross on Twitter, lemme tell you. “I give you the cold war in iambic pentameter!” Beverly announces and she gets more and more emphatic about her thesis, shouting louder and louder until her eyes roll back in her head and she collapses to the floor.
At the cop shop, Beverly’s father is desperately insisting to Dyson that her behavior is not like her and there must be a drug dealer at the school. Dyson, still being a pissy jackhole, half heartedly takes notes as he munches on – something. Sorry to interrupt your lunch hour there, babe. He gets up to get the man a glass of water. Father continues that the hospital doctors said something about Beverly’s brain activity, “she can’t stop mumbling nonsense,” and even the specialists don’t know what they’re looking at. Dyson looks up from the bubbler with a faint mien of interest at this, still chewing. Don’t forget to swallow, wolf boy. “What kind of drug can do that?” Father asks, clearly terrified. I think it’s more faemaceutical than pharma, Dad. Dyson sits down at his desk again, thumping the water down next to him. You didn’t really think that was for the frightened father now, didja? “What’s the name of your daughter?” he asks Father, taking notes again this time with resentful interest. “Beverly,” Father repeats all what the hell have I been saying for 20 minutes? Dyson gets the school name from Father too, and then orders him to go spend some time with his daughter with all the sympathy of lich insisting that he has enough there to get started. A little shell-shocked, Father thanks Dyson and leaves as the man himself washes down his lunch with the aforesaid water and broods.
At Hilton Hovel (drink!), there’s a knock at the doo – oh hell, Doctor Lauren’s back with NotComaNadia in tow. Bo, naturally, is delighted and relieved to see her and they hug. “Oh, hey Nadia,” Bo says, still clutching the doc, and that definitely deserves a snort. She invites them in, rolling her eyes after NotComaNadia while Doctor Lauren admits that the succmobile is indeed a gas guzzler. Bo inquires after their trip as NotComaNadia gets all up close and clingy to the doc, establishing territory from the outset. Honestly, I’m a little surprised she doesn’t just pee on Doctor Lauren and be done with it. “The lake was magnificent,” the doc admits, uncomfortable with NotComaNadia’s display in front of Bo. “What we saw of it,” NotComaNadia overshares. “Super!” Bo chirps unhappily. “It rained one day,” the doc offers in explanation. “I loved that day,” NotComaNadia murmurs.
Doctor Lauren asks how Bo’s been and she emphatically says how busy she’s been, what with getting stuck in a magic lamp and balling Ryan nearly nonstop. Oh yeah, doc, you’re gonna love Ryan.
Hark, there’s a knock on the open door and, what ho! The wolf! Now it’s a party!
Dyson enters Hilton Hovel a tad cautiously as Bo greets him. “Am I interrupting anything?” he asks mildly amused by my book. Doctor Lauren, NotComaNadia, and Bo are all too quick to assure him “no”. Hee. Bo asks what’s up and Dyson explains about Father and Beverly with a wry look at Doctor Lauren and NotComaNadia. “Thought you could help,” he says to Bo holding up his work folders. Bo instantly agrees and taking him by the arm, drags him past the doc and NotComaNadia. “Welcome back,” he drawls to Doctor Lauren as they pass.
He hands the file over to Bo and explains that the victim is a human who had a complete neurological shutdown, like her brain just stopped working. “She’s sixteen,” he tells her. “She’s a kid,” Bo exclaims, all her protective instincts instantly on alert. Bo wonders if it’s Fae related and Dyson admits it could be while behind them, Doctor Lauren doesn’t even try to hide the fact that she’s listening in. Dyson explains that Beverly is still in ICU and the doctors think her condition is drug related. “The Ash wants us to check it out.”
Bo goes on her toes to glance over his shoulder at the doc and NotComaNadia and slams the file shut. “Whatever you need me to do,” she tells Dyson decisively. “Go under cover?” he asks with a wry smile that makes my toes curl. “In high school?” And now they’re curling for an entirely different reason.
“Oh no!” Bo protests. “Except that!” She pleads that she didn’t do well with sixteen year old girls when she was sixteen. “You think I’m going to do any better?” Dyson asks in that voice. “Oh, come on,” Bo snorts. “Sad wolfie eyes? Chris Martin hair?” I have waited, what, 37 episodes for that Chris Martin shout out? So, heeeeeeeee.
She tugs on his curls at this last one and now it’s Dyson’s turn to roll his eyes and sigh. “Other girls,” he stresses, “could be in trouble.” Boy, does he know her weak spot. Bo sputters for a moment, but then reluctantly admits that she’s in. “Good,” Dyson says, as though there was ever any doubt. “How are you at English Lit?” “Needs improvement,” Bo admits as Doctor Lauren sidles her way over to join them. Dyson tells Bo that’s the subject she’ll be teaching. “No,” she moans. “I cannot do Jane Austen again!” Dyson with a raise of the eyebrows and a quick check on the approaching doc: “That’s what I said when I left England.” HA!
Bo: “What?!” but Dyson unfortunately doesn’t elaborate as he stands next to Bo to face Doctor Lauren. The doc is smiling a little having caught that last quip and wonders if there’s something she can do to help with the case. Dyson passes over the file and asks if the doc can check Beverly’s medical records. “Consider it done,” Doctor Lauren assures him. Aw, look at everyone making nice with everybody else. It’s six degrees of succubus sex! The doc says she’ll drop NotComaNadia off and get back to Dyson as soon as she has anything.
Dyson thanks her. As Doctor Lauren and NotComaNadia exeunt, Bo drops her strained smile. She posits to Dyson that if the problem is drugs, the kids won’t nark to a teacher and Dyson agrees. “So who do we know who speaks teenager?” Bo asks rhetorically, grinning. On cue, Kenzi powers walks into Hilton Hovel (drink!). “Hola biatches!” She stops short at the sight of Team Badass on a mission. “What, do I have maple syrup on my mouth?”
It’s back to school day as a smokin’ Bo dressed in a tight suit leads the way up the school steps, a pigtailed Kenzi at her heels. Bo checks that Kenzi knows what to do. “Unleash all this coolio onto the student population?” They pause in front of the front doors and look around the domain. “Oh honey,” Kenzi reassures, “they’re going to be printing my face onto tee shirts by lunch.” They high-five on it and split up to their respective areas. Bo grimaces as the front door, girds her loins, and plunges in.
Bo enters the classroom, Barbie Schoolteacher reporting for duty, and stands before the same class that witnessed Beverly’s breakdown. She clears her throat; one by one the presence of a hottie is communicated through the foggy neural network of pre-pubescent boys and they all – er – come to attention. Yeah, exactly like that.
Haltingly, Bo introduces herself and begins to write her name on the board. “You know,” she says, setting down the chalk. “Why don’t you just call me Bo?” Unzipping her fantastically designed suit jacket, she sets it aside as a low murmur of appreciation floats through the room and explains how she’s filling in for Teacher. She asks what they’ve been learning and one eager beaver points out the Romeo and Juliet curriculum. Bo pops back to the board with enthusiasm, chirping that they have two houses for Romeo and Juliet, “they are sworn enemies,” as she draws stick figure houses on the board and labels them. Eager Beaver pops his hand up again. “Who’s Ryan?” he asks. Bo whirls back around to see she’s written “Ryan” not “Romeo” in the house. The students laugh as Bo frantically fixes her Freudian chalk up.
In self defense, Bo suggests they “park” the romance for a while and talk about something more “today” as the Meta reaches out and clubs everyone over the head. One kid murmurs that this is going to be a great class while Bo fumbles for a topic. “OK!” she says suddenly. “The fascinating world of werewolves,” she drawls, finally getting into it. “Fact or fiction?” Hey, if he’s going to toss you to them, you might as well drag Dyson along into the spotlight. The class is mightily digging this change in subject.
Cut to the wolf himself who, hilariously, sits behind a desk with a “guidance” placard before him. Oh honey, you can guide me wherever you want me, no questions. I said that out loud again, didn’t I? For his part, Dyson couldn’t look more put out as a kid unloads his angst about how his girlfriend has been acting all crazy, going on and on about prom. Dyson asks how long this behavior has been going on and good gracious Lawd, he’s wearing a tweed jacket. Hel-lo Professor Thornwood!
Kid says maybe since midterms. “All I know is I’m all confused.” Dyson: “You’re confused,” and I think he’s seriously considering tossing the kid across the room, but he rallies, admitting that he’s heard about some strange behavior happening at this school. Kid emphatically agrees saying that one moment “Jenny” is all “flirty-flirty-flirting” (and I love the kissy miming his hands make here) and the next “she’s acting like I drove over Drake!”
“Who’s Drake?” Dyson asks, now confused too. “The rapper?” Kid explains, heavy with the duh. Hey, I went straight to Drake and Josh, so maybe you’re the one with the problem, Kid. Old Man Dyson settles back into his rocking chair. “That’s not quite the erratic behavior I was talking about,” he says and Kid demands then that Dyson explain what’s going on then, “PMS?” Dyson pauses then nods, “yeah, probably,” and no doubt is already praying a certain succubus never gets wind of this conversation. He asks Kid about drugs, “any new drugs on the scene?” Kid: “Love. Love is a drug.” Dyson shakes his head, “you really got to get over this girl,” and somehow I don’t think he’s talking about Jenny. “But I love her,” Kid insists passionately. “No, you don’t,” Dyson counters. Kid: “How do you know?!” Dyson, wearily, “Hundreds of years of experience.” And look where that got ya. “Look kid, you’re seventeen,” Dyson points out. “You don’t even know how young you are yet. Just go out, play the field, have fun, make love, be crazy…” Actually, all of that sounds pretty damn good.
Kid isn’t completely sold. “Are you sure?” Dyson is firm. “Yes. It’ll do you good.” Kid gives in and gets up to leave. “Thanks man,” he says, holding out a fist. Dyson eyes it and then the kid askance then bumps fists. Where the hell is Hale when you need him?! He would’ve been all over that playa like white on rice.
In the school hall, a giggling blonde, well, giggles with another blonde and a brunette in a cheerleader uniform. Kenzi approaches the pack, never a good idea in high school, and, in her own special way, asks where she can get some coffee. “Is that ensemble trying to share some childhood trauma with the world?” Blonde #1 sneers. Kenzi checks her roll and Blonde #1 steps up into her space. “You heard me, bitch,” she threatens. “Oh wow,” Kenzi says, “we’re already at bitch. Well it’s very nice to meet you, Heather, Heather, and Heather,” she snarks back in turn. But the Heathers reference is lost on Blonde #1. “Cult film,” Kenzi lords over them. “Circa 1988.” Blonde/Heather #1: “You’re fashion sense? Meet 2011.” Kenzi glares at her while the clueless cow carries on. “And why don’t you take those clown shoes back to whatever hobo you stole them off of and stop trying to mix outside your social circle.” With each word, Kenzi’s eyes grow bigger. This is not how she saw this scenario playing out. “You did not just insult the boots,” she whispers, incredulous and aghast. Heather #1, not realizing the danger she’s courting, glances down at Kenzi’s boots and proceed to pour her grande half cap mocha lotta boom boom all over Kenzi’s precious shoe wear, which, incidentally, are righteous. Kenzi gasps as the Heathers laugh. “Sorry,” Heather #1 smarms. “Oh honey,” Kenzi says, dropping her bag to the floor and cracking her knuckles. “It’s about to get real.”
Bo is already in the vice-principal’s office as he tells her that while she’s new here, she can’t just teach anything she likes. “Stick with Romeo and Juliet.” Bo explains that she was trying to stay away from any discussion involving hormonal teenagers, “not to mention death and drugs, especially with everything else that’s been going on at this school.” Cautiously, VP asks what Bo is implying and she brings up Beverly. “Word is she was on some pretty heavy duty study drug.” There are study drugs? Dayam. Here all I did was live in books. Who knew? VP reminds Bo that she’s only there as a substitute for a few days. “Stick with the chosen curriculum and let me handle the student population.”
There’s a quick knock at his door and Sue Sylvester Lite barges in, pushing Kenzi before her. “I had to pull this miscreant off one of my girls,” SSL explains. That’s cause your girl is a whiny bitch, lady. Ahem. SSL leaves as VP orders Kenzi to wait outside. “We done here?” he says needlessly to Bo.
“What happened?!” Bo demands when she and Kenzi finally meet up in the hallway. “The shit clique didn’t appreciate my accessorization skillz,” Kenzi explains, still pissed off and a little bemused, “especially when I tried to piece Heather #1’s nose with a pen.” Bo reminds Kenzi she’s supposed to be fitting in and Kenzi flaps her arm all these bitches be crazy as Dyson joins them. “Did you guys get anything yet?” he murmurs. “A lecture from the vice-principal and 27 invitations to the dance,” Bo chirps. “One delivered by soliloquy.” Kenzi: “Oh, nice!” They share smiles. “You?” Bo asks Dyson. “A fist bump,” he confesses wryly. “Kenz? You?” Kenzi: “Well, I was accosted by rabid Muffies, manhandled by Coach Bitchy Butch, and I got detention!” Bo: “We are not getting very far, are we?” “Teenagers,” Kenzi whispers with awe. “Our greatest foe.” Bo: “You said it, sister.” Snort.
At The Dal (drink!), Bo and Kenzi are drinking at the bar with Trick when Dyson ambles in all info dumped. “No sign of anything at the school?” Trick asks. “Nothing I could mark,” Dyson admits and Bo and Kenzi both make noises of frustration. “Well if Snoopy here can’t sniff anything out, there must not be any Fae at the school, right?” Kenzi asks. Snoopy – HA!
Dyson informs them he can’t detect any Fae who haven’t hit puberty yet. “You’re kidding,” Bo objects as Doctor Lauren tentatively joins them. “Chemically, their lack of hormonal change makes detection impossible,” she explains, butting her way right into the conversation. She adds that, like humans, Fae puberty hits between ages 11 and 15, so yippee. She pulls out Dyson’s work file, explaining that she did get access to Beverly’s medical records and blood tests indicate she was definitely infected by something Fae. But when Bo asks what kind, Doctor Lauren admits it’s nothing she’s ever seen before and she’s currently running a search to see if she can find a match. Kenzi and Team Badass all moan and groan at hitting another wall in the investigation. “We need to find out what kind of Fae is at the school,” Trick declares. “It’s just a couple of akvans, nothing capable of this,” Doctor Lauren exposits. All four heads turn in her direction. “I – spoke to The Ash,” she admits.
”What’s an akvan?” Kenzi asks. Doctor Lauren explains for those of us following along at home that in layman’s terms, akvan are dumb Fae. “They mature slower than most.” Kenzi: “I think I dated an akvan once,” Kenzi murmurs. Bo is having her entire adolescence reformed before her. “I thought it was just because I was raised by humans that I went to human school!” Trickopedia explains that it’s common practice to stick Fae children into the human system so they can study humans and learn how to blend in. “Would’ve been nice to know why I was such an outsider,” Bo grouses. “I know,” Trick soothes. Awww.
“We are going to have to do this the hard way,” Bo decides on a sigh while Dyson rubs at his face. “Torture the popular girls?!” Kenzi pipes up, all eager and ready for a little Iron Maiden action, and no, not the rock band version. “For information,” Bo says pointedly. “That too,” Kenzi agrees. “Question the infants,” Dyson growls though my closed captions say enfants so I’m apparently getting the Canadian text here. “Great,” he snits and exits to do so. “I think I need to stay away from Los Mean Girls,” Kenzi decides as Bo gets up to follow Dyson. “I mean, unless you want to deal with some broken plastics.” “Just try to fit in somewhere, OK?” Bo pleads with a parting pat on Doctor Lauren’s shoulder.
In the school gym, Kenzi and her rockin’ boots are playing chess with Eager Beaver from Bo’s class. He chides her move and when she protests, EB explains that bishops don’t go that way. “Because of their religion?” Kenzi replies. Love. It. She asks after his name and we meet “Earl,” which you gotta admit is not that far from EB. Kenzi compliments his name, “very red-neck grandpa,” and asks what he thinks of Beverly “going all Beautiful Mind” and collapsing in class. “Total waste case, huh,” she suggests and mimes toking a joint to prove her point, but an uncomfortable Earl doesn’t bite. Kenzi tries another chess move, but Earl retracts it, saying that knights don’t move diagonally. “What’s next, no body checking?” Kenzi snaps offended.
Earl thinks Beverly’s collapse was due to stress. “Yeah, well it must be hard to keep up with the mocha cappuccino slut squad,” Kenzi snits with a glare toward the rehearsing cheerleaders. “Sometimes pressure drives people to do stupid things,” Earl posits with meaning. We have a winner! Joker! Joker! And a triple!! Kenzi’s eyes narrow. “Earl, are you telling me that the RaRas are doping?” she asks hopefully. But before he can answer, Earl’s phone alarm goes off. Explaining that it’s his dad and he has to run, he asks if Kenzi will play chess again tomorrow and is delighted when she agrees. Earl scoops up his chess game and departs as Kenzi watches the cheerleaders lift one another. “Cool. Human Jenga.” As she watches, one of the Heathers starts to freak out about being lifted, looping in geometry “You’re never going to culminate into a single apex that way!” before she seizes and collapses to the ground as Kenzi watches.
Bo power walks out of her classroom. “Miss!” a voice calls and Bo turns to see Doctor Lauren coming down the hall. “Anything I can do for extra credit?” she jokes. “Lobster dinner?” Bo quips. “Back rub?” Cue the Awkward! as the doc immediately loses her friendly vibe – “Oh, I ah –” and smiles uncomfortably as she squirms because we all know there’s nothing she’d like to do more. Puzzled, Bo studies her change in demeanor. “(Doctor)Lauren, I’m kidding,” she finally points out and though Doctor Lauren says she knows the friendly moment is gone. “Whatcha got there,” Bo asks changing the subject. The doc explains that whatever the Fae drug is that’s infecting the kids, it contains embryonic tissue. “Fae eggs,” Bo sneers, disgusted, and Doctor Lauren offers a maybe but, as usual, isn’t sure. “So instead of looking for a needle in a haystack, we’re looking for what, a nest?!” The doc shrugs and Bo thanks her and moves to leave, but Doctor Lauren calls her back and rips off the bandage apologizing for what happened when she and NotComaNadia came by Hilton Hovel (drink!) the other day. “She’s not usually so public with her affections,” she says with an embarrassed eye roll. Bo brushes it off, but Doctor Lauren feels compelled to say that she’s having a hard time hiding so much from NotComaNadia. Good to know the doc’s maintaining her penchant for deceiving her lovers. “Yeah, I bet,” Bo snaps. Doctor Lauren insists that she wants to tell NotComaNadia the truth, but “how do I explain all of this?” Are we supposed to take this to mean that she still hasn’t told NotComaNadia about the Fae world et al? Also, Bo got the woman back for you, dumbass, is she supposed to be your couples counselor too? “Our lives are complicated, (Doctor) Lauren,” Bo shoots back, already done with this conversation. The doc takes the hit and flinches, but before she can respond, Kenzi comes hot trotting down the hallway, chanting in a whisper “Gold star for Kenzi!” Ha!
“One of the cheerleaders started shrieking,” she tells Bo after a quick “hey (Doctor) Lauren.” Bo: “Yeah, they do that.” Kenzi clarifies that the cheerleader “like she totally freaked out about the integrity of their lame-ass pyramid not being structurally sound or something. It was all number, fraction, garble, garble!” After which she did a Beverly. Doctor Lauren heads off to get all the student files “I don’t want to be playing catch up if this thing spreads.”
“So that’s two intellectual rants and both Beverly and this girl were cheerleaders,” Bo repeats for those just tuning in. Kenzi reminds Bo of SSL and imitates a ticking bomb adding that a little birdie told her the cheerleading team might be doping in order to get an athletic scholarship. I dunno, I heard the same convo and didn’t conclude that, but whatever. “Well, I think it’s time for me and little “Miss Curls Are for Girls” to have a little powwow,” a state of affairs Kenzi totally can get behind.
Meanwhile, Doctor Lauren returns home to her flat, striding through the open front door to find NotComaNadia sitting on the step to the second floor. I guess Lachlan’s letting the doc out for home visits now. “Hey babe,” NotComaNadia says, “Where were you?” Uber casual, Doctor Lauren strides straight for her open laptop and tells NotComaNadia that she just had to drop something off for Bo. NotComaNadia wonders why Doctor Lauren is working with Bo and the doc muses that she is just a coworker. NotComaNadia embraces Doctor Lauren from behind and nuzzles her cheek as the doc smiles. “Let’s go somewhere fun,” she prods. The doc wonders where s NotComaNadia wants to go. “I dunno, like that other labof yours.” Doctor Lauren chuckles. “Make love by the light of the Bunsen burners.” Doctor Lauren chuckles as NotComaNadia kisses her neck. The doc admits that she would love to do that, but she has to finish this work first. Quick tip: If you lover is putting off sex to work, you have a serious problem.
NotComaNadia chides her for being no fun (no kidding!) and continues to try and change the doc’s mind, but the guilt has begun to sink in. “(NotComa)Nadia, there’s so much I haven’t – ” She looks at her girlfriend and chickens out, “haven’t figured out about this case.” NotComaNadia stops kissing her neck. “And you haven’t picked up your camera in ages,” she points out. Yeah, that would be because of the mystical coma. She suggests NotComaNadia takes some pictures but when her girlfriend picks up the camera with a “sure babe,” it’s to take pictures of Doctor Lauren. Sigh. Bored now.
I do like the artwork on the wall behind the doc though, an outline of a naked woman’s silhouette. “Gimme something provocative. Pull up your hair,” NotComaNadia eggs on. As she works on the laptop, Doctor Lauren chuckles that this is not what she had in mind. “God (Doctor)Lauren,” NotComaNadia murmurs, brushing the doc’s hair back from her face. “You are so beautiful.” She pulls Doctor Lauren forward and takes more pictures as the doc begins to get into it, pulling her hair back and smiling provocatively. NotComaNadia pulls her close, unbuttoning the doc’s blouse. “Let’s make these pictures a little more interesting, a little more beautiful.” She snaps away as Doctor Lauren opens her shirt, totally ready to get down now. NotComaNadia puts her camera aside. “That’s the old (Doctor) Lauren I remember,” she says, going in for the kiss. But at the last minute, the doc dodges the lip lock and steps back, citing work. Ouch. Cold doc. Nearly frigid. This time NotComaNadia feels the sting personally and knows something is Not Right. As the doc rebuttons her shirt, NotComaNadia picks up her camera and sidles away while Doctor Lauren gazes after her guilty and regretful. Why do people like this chick again? Cause I am missing it completely.
Back at high school, Bo enters the women’s gym where a grunting SSL is doing a set of bench lifts. Bo wonders if she can ask SSL a few questions. “Kinda in the middle of a set!” SSL grits out. Bo doesn’t care, and asks if SSL knows what happened to Beverly and the other cheerleader. I’m entertained by the sign on the wall behind her that says “Please respect your opponent at all times.” Clear Eyes, Full Hearts, Can’t Lose it’s not.
SSL wonders what Bo interest is in “her girls.” Bo points out that something put them in the hospital. SSL is confident the situation is being handled appropriately, but Bo doesn’t think SSL is handling the girls “appropriately” and the gloves are off. She tells SSL that the doctors are speculating the problem is drugs. “You think I gave them something?” SSL asks. “I do now,” Bo retorts. SSL crosses the room to confront Bo, warning her that she’s in way over her head. “That’s just where I like it,” Bo snaps back. SSL wonders if that’s a threat. “Yeah,” Bo murmurs, “why not?” She reaches for SSL’s cheek to pour on the succubus juice, but SSL surprises her, slapping her hand away and turning her into a hold so tight Bo cries out. “Pretty little thing,” SSL snarls. “Bet you had all the boys after you, huh?” “I bet they were all terrified of you,” Bo shoots back, trying to kick SSL in the shin. SSL kicks her feet out from under her and takes Bo to the floor straddling her. Face to face now, SSL mocks Bo for her mistake, but the succubus has her prey right where she needs her as Bo leans up and delivers the succubus kiss.
Calmer now, SSL and Bo sit on the floor across from one another in the corner of the locker room. SSL tells her that a few of the girls were going for athletic scholarships and she helped them out a little. “Steroids?” Bo asks. SSL admits to small amounts, barely noticeable. Bo: “I bet they noticed.” She asks if there’s anything else and SSL confesses to very low doses of diuretics to keep the weight down. She says she thought she was helping and Bo delivers the after school special moment of the month by telling her that the girls are just kids and they look up to SSL. “You have to take that as seriously as your work outs.” She leans forward and strokes SSL’s face, ordering her to stop giving the girls whatever. SSL: “Fer sure.” Heh. “Don’t make me come back here,” Bo warns with a pant on SSL’s knee as she rises. “I love you!” SSL calls after her, and Bo sighs heavily as she pauses. “Yeah,” she drawls and smiles with satisfaction. “I know.” Oh you go, girl. You just go on with yourself there.
A disembodied hand pulls on a workman’s glove. Releasing the catch on a metal cage, the hand reaches in to retrieve a small egg. Out of nowhere, an avian creature pecks violently as the hand removes the egg from a nest.
Back at high school, a pickup truck pulls up next to the athletic field. Kenzi, adorable in the rain under her umbrella, smiles and waves at Earl in the truck. Earl waves back and makes to scamper from the car, but his dad stops him, reminding Earl to take his lunch. “Where are you off to in such a hurry?” Dad asks. Earl: “Trying to intersect the path of a girl so it actually looks natural,” Earl natters. Oh, sweet boy. Dad reminds him to keep his mind on his studies and not on girls, so now we know that this guy is totally Fae because that is a ridonkulous plan for a fifteen year old boy. Earl says that Kenzi is different. “We play chess!” Dad: “Yeah? She any good?” Earl cheerfully shakes his head. “She’s terrible!” he says, delighted and they giggle. “I may love her though,” Earl adds, and Dad wins me over by telling his son that girls like love smart guys.
Earl scampers from the truck in pursuit of Kenzi, finding her back in the gym, ready to rock the chess board. Kenzi asks if Earl’s dad drives him to school every day and when Earl confirms it, adds that it must be nice. This from the Goth Girl who nearly invoked Baba Yaga against her stepfather multiple times. Earl admits that it is nice and new actually as he didn’t get to spend much time with his dad before he made the school’s Reach for the Top Team. “I think he gets a kick out of it. We’re in the regional finals!” Kenzi compliments him on being a quiz show geek and a chess master. “You’re the bomb, Earl!”
Earl expositions that VP put the team together and personally picked Earl and two of his buddies for the team. “We’ve never lost,” he says and Kenzi digs the pride. Earl goes on to tell her that he’s put in a lot of hard work lately, scored a few As, and it’s made everyone happy and it “really seems to help with the ladies…” Kenzi isn’t paying this last bit any attention, which is why she’s completely caught off guard when Earl leans forward and kisses her. “Nahhhhhh!! What the Earl are you doing?!” she exclaims. Earl is immediately apologetic, poor dear, but Kenzi scuttles away all the same, leaving him moping in the stands.
“It was one of those fairly quick but wet and slobbering ones, you know like when you’re kissing a puppy with the flu.” Kenzi details Earl’s kiss as she and Bo amble down the school corridor. Bo suggests that slobbery can be nice. “I’m sorry, Miss Succubus, when is the last time you had to kiss the horny gooey Lord of the Chess Board, huh?” Kenzi thinks Earl’s fame has gone to his little head as well. Bo laughs as she asks for clarification and Kenzi details Earl’s recent accomplishments. This pings for Bo, but Kenzi isn’t following. “I’m still on post-traumatic kiss syndrome.” Bo notes the fact that VP puts together a brain trust of recent geniuses, “Beverly freaks out spouting Shakespeare and Sarah blows a gasket over math.” Kenzi concludes that Bo thinks it’s the evil vice principal and Bo agrees that no one ever likes the vice principal. “OK, you go check on his potency, I’ll be in the little girl’s room chewing on a bar of soap. OK?”
Seconds after Kenzi trots away, the door behind Bo bursts open and Ryan strides into the school. “Hey Teach,” he quips to Bo. Ryan?! What the hell is he doing there? This is one hell of an accessible school, I gotta say. Bo, naturally, freaks out to see him. Looking after Kenzi, she shoves Ryan back against the wall – I’m with you there, sweetie – and demands to know what he’s doing there. Also a very good move. “It’s nice to see you too,” he retorts. Swinging her around, he points out the poster for the Enchantment Under the Sea Dance. All right, it’s actually just “the dance”, but wouldn’t that have been kewl?! Ryan wonders if Bo is looking for a date to it. “Actually, it’s more the after party that interests me,” he admits. For him the whole dance corsage thing is just foreplay but then I suspect most things are just foreplay for Ryan. Bo snits that she wouldn’t know about that, the implication being that she never got to go to the high school dance, but Ryan deliberately misconstrues that she means the after party. “Oh come on! It’s where you lose your cherry to your very special first love.” Snort. Bo orders him to go and Ryan promises that he will be better than her first love, “no fumbling,” he swears, holding up two fingers like a naughty Boy Scout. Bo is not playing and Ryan finally grasps the fact that he’s hit a nerve.
Bo grabs him by the lapels again. “Look, some people, they’re just not meant to be with each other!” she says emphatically. Ryan returns the grab, giving her a shake for good measure. I kinda love that about him. “No! Some people,” he repeats deliberately, “think too much.” Bo moans and whinges with frustration as Ryan tells her that there’s a part of her that needs to be explored. “You need to let it out – just embrace it!”
“I like you I just – I just don’t like that I like you!” Bo finishes through gritted teeth, which actually makes a lot of sense to me. Ryan is undaunted. “I can work with that. Yeah!” he pats her on the shoulder and soldiers on, utterly pleased with himself as Bo’s shoulders droop.
As Ryan leaves down one direction, Bo staring after him, wondering how she gets out of a relationship with a man who doesn’t bother to acknowledge the word “no,” Dyson and his long-legged stride amble down from the other end unnoticed. Oh my giddy aunt, it’s Christmas. Seriously, this show has sparked more in the last five minutes than it has in – well, a long bloody time! Bring on the men!
A scowl forms as Dyson recognizes Ryan’s retreating form. “What’s Ryan Lambert doing here?” he demands of Bo, catching her off guard. She stumbles for words finally settling on the fact that it’s nothing and she’s handled it (when we all know she hasn’t). “He’s dark Fae, Bo,” Dyson reminds her in case she missed that salient fact. To be fair, she did at first. “He has no business being involved in this.” Bo assures him quickly that Ryan is not involved in the school thing. “It’s personal.” Frankly, judging by the involuntary head jerk, I think Dyson likes that even less. “You are unaligned,” Dyson allows grudgingly. “You can do what you want.” Yeah, you really don’t get a say in that any more darling. Bo lifts her chin, all about done with both of her men. “I wasn’t asking for permission,” she snits and stalks past him as Dyson fumes at her back. That is the most delicious tension and electricity they’ve had between them in too bloody long a time. Almost it’s like their – ahem – play by play from the halcyon days of season one. I LIKE it!
Back in Dyson’s guidance counselor office – snicker – a girl chain chews mints, or possibly mini marshmallows, while she whinges that she thought Earl really liked her and was just shy but now she hears he’s been making out with other girls and by “other girls” she means Kenzi. Dyson asks if this is strange behavior for Earl and Mint Girl vehemently agrees. Dyson, who is taking notes but could not care less about what the girl says, asks if she knows what caused the change in Earl. “Hello?” she says. “Obviously.” Dyson perks up – really? – and Mint Girl starts to cry. “It was me,” she whispers. Dyson inhales deeply but manages to reach deep and not tell the poor girl to get a life. “It’s not you,” he assures her, surprisingly gentle, “It’s him.”
“What if he was my soul mate?” Mint Girl asks on a new sob, and this is finally the limit for D-man. He sighs deeply, pulls out more tissue, and passes it over. “Crying is not going to help. Trust me.” Oh poor, wounded wolf.
“Doesn’t anyone have any real problems at this school?” he mutters to himself. And we’re back to being an asshole.
He glances up again at Mint Girl sobbing woefully and softens. “Look,” he says gently with shades of his former self. “You are a beautiful, obviously sensitive young woman. You’re going to find another mate for your soul.” Even if he doesn’t. Mint Girl nods miserably. “You have a girlfriend?” she asks, and Dyson minimizes epic angst with a simple “no.” Mint Girl: “Want one?” Oh honey, I know where you’re coming from, but no.
A look of horror falls over Dyson’s face, but Mint Girl is already nodding and sobbing anew. “Yeah, okay. I get it.” Dyson sighs, “No, I didn’t mean it like that,” he says quickly and then just wisely shuts up and shoves the entire box of tissues across the desk.
In the VP’s office, the man himself tells Bo he’s very proud of the team he put together and Bo agrees that she hears they’re doing well. He preens that the school has never had this level of success and the esteem it’s garnering from it is priceless. As his phone rings, Bo mentions that VP must get a lot personally too and that the team’s transformation is remarkable. VP thinks it’s a testament to hard work. Bo worries that the kids are under a lot of needless pressure, and the Veep goes on a rant about how he’s helping the kids get scholarships yada yada yada the gist of which is it’s not him.
At Hilton Hovel (drink!), Kenzi is doing geometry homework. Bless. Bo greets her to which Kenzi flatly returns, “Salutations.” Looking over Kenzi’s shoulder, Bo wonders what she’s doing. “Euclidean geometry,” Kenzi says quietly. “It’s due tomorrow.” Bo chuckles uncomfortably and reminds Kenzi that she’s undercover and doesn’t actually have to do the homework. “But I’m good at it,” Kenzi says dully. “Did you know you can actually make a function out of essentially anything over a period of time?” Ruh roh. Someone’s been drinking the brainiac Kool Aide. Kenzi natters on robotically about the wonders of geometry with increasing passion as Bo looks on with growing and horrified understanding. “Doesn’t that just blow your mind?” Kenzi asks. “Oh, it’s totally blowing my mind,” she repeats in a whisper. “Yeah,” Bo says with fear. “That’s what I’m afraid of.”
Bo marches Kenzi into Doctor Lauren’s flat while Kenzi speed speeches on and on about Euclidean geometry. I merely like the fact that I’ve just typed “Euclidean” three times without getting it wrong once, though a flawless ‘just’ appears to be beyond me.
“Oh no, don’t tell me,” Doctor Lauren says. “I think Kenzi’s been infected by the same thing as the others,” Bo announces desperately. She just said not to tell her! Doctor Lauren hustles them to her wide arm chair where Kenzi collapses with a final, “For over 2000 years, they didn’t even called it Euclidean geometry,” and that makes four, “cause there was no other kind, kind of like Italian food in Italy.”
With no warning, Doctor Lauren plunges a needle into Kenzi’s thigh with absolutely no response from the Goth Girl besides a sudden eerie silence. “What are we going to do?!” Bo begs Doctor Lauren, trailing behind her as the doc returns to her mobile lab unit. “I can practically hear her brain boiling!” Doctor Lauren exhorts her not to worry that she has some good news that whatever infected the cheerleaders follows a curve. “First there’s increased brain function. That’s the stage that Kenzi’s in now.” Yeah, we got that far, doc. She explains that then the substance expands to overwhelm the human brain. Bo doesn’t think that’s terribly good news, but the doc thinks that the more they know about the thing, the better their chances of stopping it. As they catch one another up, Kenzi is studying the chemistry panel the doc has up on her electronic white board. Bo asks how long it was before Beverly lost it and Doctor Lauren admits that it was only two days but she’s hoping she can do better than that for Kenzi with some sedation.
“This is incorrect,” Kenzi states flatly as she picks up Doctor Lauren’s eye pad and a stylus and before the doc can stop her, she wipes the board clean. “You had that saved, right?!” Bo asks Doctor Lauren. I noticed there’s another gorgeous print, this time charcoal if I don’t miss my guess, of a voluptuous naked woman on the wall behind an aghast doc and Bo. But Kenzi tells them it doesn’t matter since the formula was based on a false hypothesis. “You assumed that the infectious agent could only bind to DNA using standard transcription factors,” she explains while noodling on the pad. Doctor Lauren takes a minute to process this and then admits with growing excitement that Kenzi is right. She tells Bo that The Ash’s file said all the Fae students in the school were akvans, “but what if someone was giving them something to make them smarter?” Kenzi: “That would explain the super cooling of the DNA – hello?”
Bo doesn’t understand how the akvans could have infected the cheerleaders and Kenzi but the doc thinks it could’ve happened any number of ways, probably orally, “but we’ll need the source of the infection.” Meanwhile, Kenzi is creating her own formula on the electric white board. Bo is already on her way out the door while ordering Doctor Lauren to take care of Kenzi. The doc tells her that whatever this thing is they have to stop it before it spreads beyond the school because if they don’t it could quite literally infect, “everyone everywhere,” Bo finishes for her, “I got it.”
Back at the school, Bo is power walking her way up the stairs when Dyson catches up with her and lets her know he knows about Kenzi. Bo explains that Doctor Lauren thinks she can create an antidote if they can find the source of the infection and Dyson wonders what Bo has in mind. She is still set on the VP not able to reconcile the fact that he put together a brain trust team out of nowhere that shot to the top at Regionals. Dyson points out that even if the Veep is involved, he’s not Fae and couldn’t have infected the kids without help. Bo sighs heavily, thwarted again, and Dyson asks how Doctor Lauren thinks the virus is being transmitted. “Orally. Kenzi - must have – ” Dyson, with an eyebrow raise, “What? Kissed someone?” and finally Bo clues in. “Of the horny chess player variety,” she concludes. Dyson grimaces. “I know someone who fits that description,” and once again, Team Badass is in total accord.
For his part, Earl is at his locker, but when he closes the door, Stalker Dyson is suddenly there. “Earl, right?” Earl: “Please don’t hurt me.” Dyson clarifies that Earl kissed both Beverly and Sarah and Earl admits it but quickly adds that he’s found someone else. “Kenzi,” Dyson says. “And you kissed her too.” Earl wonders how Dyson knows that. “Because they’re all sick, Earl! Thanks to you.” Dyson accuses. Earl is upset to hear Kenzi is sick but Dyson just wants to know what Earl is on that his grades improved so dramatically. Earl insists he’s just been working harder. “You want to help Kenzi?” Dyson asks rhetorically. “You think harder!” He demands to know what Earl is doing that’s new and Earl says he’s been getting up earlier to review his homework while his dad makes him lunch. Dyson orders Earl to show him the lunch. Earl hands over the brown bag and Dyson takes a big wolf whiff of it. “Eggs,” he mutters. Earl says his dad insists that he needs the protein. Dyson demands to know where Earl’s dad is now and Earl says he’s with the Veep discussing Earl’s college applications and Dyson drags the poor boy off to the principal’s office…
…where Bo knocks on the door. The room is empty though, so Bo slides inside to look around, riffling through the desk drawers and then the file cabinets when the Veep catches her and moves to call security. You should tell them to step up their game, Veep, because based on Doctor Lauren’s and Ryan’s ease of access, pretty much anyone can wander through your halls.
Bo confronts him about infecting the brain trust team with akvan eggs, but the Veep, naturally, has no idea what she’s talking about. Bo wonders what the Veep’s deal which is about the time Earl’s father barges in wielding a hammer because he’s hammering out stupid all over this land. He orders the Veep to leave, but the principal tries to reason with the crazy man who promptly slams his hammer through a lamp. Very much not a euphemism. “I would listen to the man with the hammer,” Bo suggests to Veep who flees like a little girl as Bo and Earl’s dad each draw a line in the sand. “Who the hell are you?” Earl’s dad growls and Bo smiles without humor.
Bo and Earl’s dad square off. Bo can’t believe that Earl’s dad is partnering with the Veep to drug his own kid and Earl’s dad explains that the Veep doesn’t know, he just thinks he stumbled onto a gold mine of smart kids. “We’re fine with that.” “We?” Bo targets. “Me and the other fathers.” He goes on about how sick and tired they all are at being second rate. “This is the chance for my Earl and the other kids to change the course for akvans forever.” “By artificially increasing their intelligence? Forcing them to be something that they’re not?!” But Earl’s dad doesn’t care as long as it gives his kid a better life than the rest of them. “What are you pumping into your son?!” Bo demands to know. “That is none of your business,” Earls’ dad grits back and smashes the hammer down onto the telephone. Bo jumps back from the flying debris and takes a wide turn around Earl’s dad until she reaches the far side of the room. Picking up a chair to wield against him, she explains that the infection is spreading to the human population, but Earl’s dad doesn’t care about humans. In her final gambit, Bo wonders what the kids will do when they find out what their fathers have done. “Oh he’ll never find out,” Earl’s dad says with confidence. “Not from you!” He swings wildly for her, splintering the chair from her hands. They scuffle, but, as usual, it ends with Bo on top, wielding the hammer. As she demands again to know what Earl’s dad is giving his son, Dyson and Earl himself burst into the room – FINALLY.
Earl whinges at his dad that he made Earl believe he succeeded through hard work. “Hard work only takes people like us so far,” his dad grouses. They have Father/Son angst that I’m not going to recap because it doesn’t matter. Dad loves son no matter what and only wanted what was best for him. “I could never not love you.” Earl’s dad says savaging the double negative and they hug it out. There. All done. Goodbye Earl. Yes, I have been waiting all episode long to use that line.
At The Dal (drink!), the cage bird sings as Bo watches it warily. “This is what made them smarter,” she says to Trick, heavy with the disbelief. Trickopedia explains that the simurgh (I swear he said smurf) are symbols of divinity and wisdom. Intelligence can be gained by the consumption of its eggs. “Talk about a study aide,” Bo snarks. Trick covers the cage with a small tapestry, adding that the use of a simurgh is strictly prohibited. “The akvans broke a very serious Fae law,” he explains. Bo wants to make sure that they’ll be punished for it. “To a point,” Trick allows. “Being a parent isn’t easy.” Bo thinks there should be a license required to raise children but Trick reminds her that there is no magic formula for it as young giggling reaches them from across the room. Bo and Trick peer over to the bar where Kenzi and Earl are playing chess. Trick notes that Kenzi appears to be back to normal. “Yeah - normal for Kenzi,” Bo allows. She proudly tells Trick that Doctor Lauren was able to manufacture a cure once she knew the source and was able to get it to Sarah and Beverly just in time.
At the bar, Kenzi corrects Earl’s move but when he asks why he can’t move his piece that way, Kenzi pauses, then encourages him to move it any way he likes. So I guess the brain trust is wearing off then. Earl knocks her piece aside. “My horse just totally smashed your castle,” he says triumphantly. Kenzi: “I told you this game was way better with body checking!” Earl notes that Kenzi is letting him win “because I’m stupid again,” so clearly not all the brain power has leaked away yet. Kenzi tells him not to think that way and that he has many wonderful qualities like patient and a lack of judgment. “Thick head of hair too!” Earl decides this is the time to try and kiss her again, but Kenzi manages to deflect him. “That is not code for taking another lunge at me,” she tells him. “Besides, you haven’t seen my best move yet.” She takes two of her pawns and “smashes your helmet guy just like that!” Earl: “Oh, I totally didn’t see that coming.” Sweet boy.
Back at the school, Ryan is leading a protesting Bo down the hall. “I get the need for closure, I do, but I meant what I said. This isn’t going to work,” she tells him. Ryan assures her he has no expectation. Bo demands to know where he is taking her and Ryan asks that she just give him two minutes of her time. He positions her in place and flips the breakers. Lights ignite around Bo, illuminating the decorations still in place for the Enchantment Under the Sea dance. Hey, I’m going with it. Deal.
Bo’s jaw drops and her face looks up like a teenager entering prom – which is kind of exactly what’s happening here. She exhales. “Oh. Wow.” Ryan: “Thought you could use a good high school memory, so I made you one.” Oh, I like him! Have I mentioned that I like him?
Overcome, Bo admits that it’s not bad. Ryan snaps his fingers. “That is what I like to hear!” But Bo isn’t finished. “For someone else,” she caveats and goes on to say that she appreciates all he’s done for her, “and some woman is going to find you utterly irresistible!” Ryan: “Thank you.” Snort. Fait accompli, chere. But Bo thinks it’s too complicated. Ryan disagrees. “We are not Romeo and Juliet,” he points out, turning Bo to face her fantasy prom setting. “We’re not star-crossed lovers. We are just two kind of amazing people who really like each other.” He murmurs this last in her ear and Bo would have to be an ice statue not to melt. Satisfied that he’s convinced her, Ryan flips his last switch. The disco ball whirls and sparkles as Just One Look begins to play and oh my dear holy lord, the man dances too. Kill me now.
He holds his hand out to Bo – “wanna dance?” – and she allows him to draw her out on the floor and through a few moves. “You know,” she says, once finally settled in a clinch, “I never went to prom.” Ryan dips her deep and Bo laughs with pure pleasure. “I hear it’s all about the after party anyway,” he quips. They dance and twirly, twirly, twirl as it all turns quite romantic. “I don’t think we’re going to make our curfew,” Bo murmurs, nuzzling close, which is when I start to kind of wish they’d cut to show Dyson standing in the doorway…
…instead we cut back to Doctor Lauren’s flat. Yippee. “That was amazing,” the doc says to NotComaNadia in a post coital bliss. She stands up so we can see she’s wearing only her open blouse and panties. Sexy, sexy Zoie Palmer in da house! Doctor Lauren tells NotComaNadia she’s going to take a shower and for once, invites her actual girlfriend to join her. NotComaNadia promises that she’ll be up in a minute. With a coy tilt of her head, Doctor Lauren okays this plan and precedes NotComaNadia up the stairs. Once she’s confident the doc is gone, NotComaNadia tugs a folder from her bag, revealing the pictures she took of Doctor Lauren except instead of her sexy girlfriend in frame every shot is only of the doc’s necklace, the symbol of her ownership by The Ash. Dun dun DUN!!
Fae of the Day:
Akvans: n. literally means “dumb fae”. Low-level light Fae who mature more slowly than standard Fae. Not known for intelligence.
Origin: unknown. Possibly Persian.
Simurgh: n. Underfae. Symbols of divinity and wisdom. Use of their egg to stimulate growth in intelligence is forbidden.
Quotes of the Night:
Kenzi: You slept in! How me of you.
Kenzi: I don’t expect you to holster your honey pot. Bo: Oh gee, thanks.
Bo: Why don’t you just go and enjoy your flap jacks, short stack?
Bo: I don’t think I can keep it up! Ryan: Don’t worry about it, that’s my job.
Dyson: You think I’m going to do any better? Bo: Oh, come on. Sad wolfie eyes? Chris Martin hair?
Bo: I cannot do Jane Austen again! Dyson: That’s what I said when I left England.
Kenzi: Oh wow. We’re already at bitch. Well it’s very nice to meet you, Heather, Heather, and Heather.
Kenzi: You did not just insult the boots.
Dyson: Did you guys get anything yet? Bo: 27 invitations to the dance. One delivered by soliloquy! Kenzi: Oh, nice!
Kenzi: Teenagers. Our greatest foe. Bo: You said it, sister.
Earl: Bishops don’t go that way. Kenzi: Because of their religion?
Kenzi: Cool. Human Jenga.
Kenzi: Yeah, well it must be hard to keep up with the mocha cappuccino slut squad.
Earl’s Dad: Where are you off to in such a hurry?” Earl: I’m trying to intersect the path of a girl so it actually looks natural.
Kenzi: I’m sorry, Miss Succubus, when is the last time you had to kiss the horny gooey Lord of the Chess Board?
Bo: I like you I just – I just don’t like that I like you! Ryan: I can work with that.
Mint Girl: You have a girlfriend? Dyson: No. Mint Girl: Want one?
Ryan: Thought you could use a good high school memory, so I made you one.
Next week: Season 2 Episode 17: The Girl Who Faed With Fire