After watching the season finale, I really want to discuss the last scene first. But we don’t do it like that over here, so bear with me. I know you are all frothing to get to that ending, just like I am.
Let’s start at the very beginning, a very good place to start (sorry, Sound of Music moment). Lafayette and Jesus are sitting on the deck talking over breakfast, while really Jesus is, and Marnie is listening. Jesus is saying he shouldn’t have brought Lafayette into the coven and that he wants them both to live a magic free-life. He tells Lafayette to eat his breakfast and Lafayette/Marnie dips a fork into her egg yolk and stabs Jesus in the hand! Egg yolk already makes me ill thanks to Dexter, way to go True Blood. If I eat another egg anytime soon....
After the show theme, we have Sookie in the kitchen where she has a vision of Gran laying on the floor. Tara comes in and they reminisce about Gran, then Sookie confesses that during her reading with Marnie, Gran came to her and said to stay away from Eric. And that she feels like Gran is still around them right now.
Then we have Sam standing over Tommy’s grave when Maxine comes to place flowers. They have a little heart to heart about Tommy, Maxine ends the convo telling Sam to call her Mom and that she’d be over later with a pork rind casserole. Eww again. Stop with the killing of the foods.
Meanwhile, Jason is in his truck talking to himself in the mirror about what a good person he is, then steps out to talk to Hoyt. Jason has the nerve to say my least favorite word, “moist,” and proceeds to tell Hoyt he slept with Jessica. After Hoyt busts a gut laughing, Jason finally convinces him that he really did sleep with her. Hoyt asks “How?” and Jason being Jason proceeds to tell him all the positions they had sex in. Hoyt punches Jason, and says “HOW could you do this to me, not HOW many positions did they do it in.” He then proceeds to kick the shit out of Jason. GO HOYT!
Back at Lafayette and Jesus, Marnie has Jesus tied to a chair. Jesus is trying to convince Marnie to leave, Lafayette doesn’t deserve this. She says she’ll leave, but she wants something: namely, all of Jesus’s magic. Jesus tells her, “You can’t trade magic like fucking Pokémon cards” <—-line of the night right there, but he finally agrees. That’s when shit gets weirder, then weird, he starts to chant and brings forth the demon—at which point, Marnie stabs him in the chest. Jesus whispers “I’m sorry” to Lafayette.
At Merlotte’s, it’s Halloween and Sookie goes in to see Sam. Having no idea that it’s Halloween, Sookie almost pees herself when Arlene and Terry are dressed as Zombies. Arlene says “Don’t you know, zombies are the new vampire?” I admit, I giggled. Arlene also lets Sookie know that Tommy is dead, so Sook rushes back to Sam. After giving her condolences, Sam realizes Tommy fired Sookie but for some reason doesn’t let her know that, he just says he had an off day and rehires her. After making her don bunny ears for Halloween.
Alcide happens to be in the bar and tells Sookie that he broke up with Debbie for good, and that Sookie should be with him. Sookie, if you don’t take him up on his offer, I have a line-up of ladies who are up to the challenge. He ends up getting a call and having to go check one of his construction sites. When he gets there, he finds a hole in the parking lot and silver chains. Looks like Russell Edington has broken out!
Also inside the bar, Arlene’s daughter is dressed like Janelle from Teen Mom 2, which totally made me cackle loudly. Sam introduces Emma, Luna’s daughter, to Arlene and Terry’s kids. Then Terry hears someone call him Private, turns around and it’s his old Marine buddy Patrick (Noel from Felicity). Arlene already looks like she doesn’t like him. Wonder what’s up with that?
Later that night, Arlene takes out the trash and meets the ghost of Rene. He tells her that he loved her and the baby, but warns her that Terry is bringing trouble with the ghosts of his past and then says “run.” I’m guessing this has something to do with Patrick’s arrival.
Tara goes to check on Lafayette and Jesus, and when she arrives the door is open a crack. She walks in and screams, Jesus is dead in a chair. *sniffle* I’m still angry about that, but we’ll revisit that later.
Outside Merlotte’s, Holly scares Sookie (gosh, she’s jumpy isn’t she?). Holly lights a joint and tells Sook she is anxious on Samhain (Halloween), she also tells her about witches and how the veil is thin. They both agree they have a bad feeling about things, when Tara drives up and tells them Jesus is dead and Marnie has possessed Lafayette. They take off and try to reach Bill and Eric, but realize Marnie has gotten to them first.
Eric and Bill indeed have been tied up, a la Antonia’s fire death, and are complaining to each other that neither will call Pam or Jess for the sake of pride.
When the girls pull up to Bill’s, they find both vamps, but when they rush over, Lafayette/Marnie comes out. Tara tries to reason with Marnie, but she won’t listen and sets the vampires on fire. While all of them distract Marnie, Holly sets a salt circle around the vamps and joins hands with Tara and Sookie to begin a spell that brings all the dead out of their graves.
Marnie’s sister is the first one out and stops the fire, saying that all creatures in life serve their purpose, even vampires. Then out comes Gran and she reaches into Lafayette’s mouth and yanks the bitch Marnie out! Finally, out comes Antonia and she is the voice of reason that Marnie listens too. Gran and Sookie have a moment, Sookie breaks down crying and all the ghosts return to their graves. Tara is the first to run to check on Lafayette, who starts to stir when Eric clears his throat. “Hello, we’re feeling a little crispy over here.”
We get a scene of Little Red Riding Hood running through the forest, only to realize it’s Jess as she knocks on Jason’s door. She sees his face and asked what happened:
“If Hoyt jumps outta that cloak, I’mma knock him the fuck out”
That brought the loudest laugh of the night for me, so unexpected. Anyways, Jason tells her that he told Hoyt about them, they have sex and then Jason has the most intelligent conversation in his True Blood history. Long story short, Jess doesn’t want commitment because she just got out of her first relationship. No surprise there. When Jess finally leaves, a knock sounds at the door. Jason thinks its Jess, but shocker....Rev. Newland, and he’s got fangs!
At Fangtasia, Pam comes in looking for Eric and the waitress that’s always there but to my recollection still has no name, says Sookie was looking for him as well. That sets Pam off, asking what it is about Sookie and her Fairy Vagina that has turned Eric this way. How he’s left her because of someone named Sookie. She ends up a puddle of vampires tears being rocked by the waitress.
Back at Sookie’s, Tara is talking with Lafayette about Jesus. How he didn’t kill him and they would get through this together. Hmph. Lafayette eventually falls asleep, only to be woken up by the ghost of Jesus, who tells him it wasn’t his fault and that everything is only temporary. Jesus is cool with how things went, Lafayette asks how he is going to deal without him. Jesus says just keep breathing and as a medium Jesus will always be with him.
Over at Bill’s, Sookie is double feeding Bill on one arm and Eric on the other. After feeding, she ends up telling both vampires that she can’t be with them, that it wouldn’t be fair and how this is the best choice for them. She loves them both and can’t pick, it’s not right. Eric looks all smug until that comes out of her mouth.
For some reason, Andy and Holly get a minute and patch things up. Andy confesses he was a drug addict and wants to try again. Holly ends up asking for a hug because after the night she’s had she needs one. Fade to black. Where’s the fairy?
Sam is saying goodbye to Luna at his house, he asks her to stay and she says it’s not good for Emma yet. As she is pulling out, Sam hears a noise. When he turns there is a black wolf behind him. I have no idea who it is.....
Nan shows up at Bill’s house with her security team, Eric makes a comment that they look like gay storm troopers. Ahem, offensive much? Anyway, Bill tells her Marnie is dead and Nan really doesn’t give a shit because she’s been fired from the AVL and the Authority. She says there is a true death warrant out on all their heads and they should form a mutiny against them. She makes some comment to Bill, and BAM! her guards are dead, then BAM! she’s dead. Bill killed her.
Sookie goes home and is rummaging through the fridge calling for Tara to see if she’s still awake. She hears a noise and turns thinking its Tara, surprise, it’s Debbie Pelt with a gun. Everything happens really fast, but the end result is the same. Debbie shoots Tara, Sookie shoots Debbie. The final scene is Sookie rocking Tara while screaming for help.
Now, I am right pissed people. PISSED. It was one thing to kill Jesus, it made sense to me but to kill Tara, oh HELL NO. Why do the minorities in this series always get killed? Eggs anyone? Even in the books it’s the same, so I should have saw this coming. I know, two deaths were not minorities but when you kill off one of your two gay characters and then two of your minorities, I get a little issued with it. I really didn’t think they would kill off Tara, and who knows, maybe they didn’t but she did get shot in the head if I saw correctly.
See, this series has always tried to make the vampires the outsiders, dealing with prejudice. But doing this and having Eric make a comment about “gay” storm troopers irritated the hell out of me.
There were also way too many ends left loose; where the hell did the fairy go? Why introduce a new character and bring back two old characters? I think last week’s episode would have been a better season finale, but hey, that’s just me.
What did you all think? Am I insane to be irritated? Did you love it? Was there overkill with SEVEN deaths in one episode? My biggest question: Are you going to watch next season?
*poor Tara* yes, I’m still upset.
Natasha Carty reviews Paranormal Romance and Urban Fantasy on her website Wicked Little Pixie and lives in Toronto, Canada, with her cat, Seamus.